I had a horrible feeling following my previous post. my motivations behind posting scriptures recently and commenting on them has been to honor my father. am faking it? it was the feeling of deception. I had the feeling that I'm not being real, and that is a horrible feeling.
it's so easy for me to speak passionately and from the heart. it is a much more difficult thing for me to define what it is that I believe. at any given moment, I think what I believe depends heavily upon how I feel. so in the interest of being real, let me say a few things that I think I believe...at the moment...
I believe God loves me and wants me to be happy.
beyond that, I'm just not sure. I hope that Jesus is the Son of God and that he died for my sins. I don't believe the entire Bible is the inspired word of God. I fear absolutes. anything absolute deprives me of my ability to think for myself and gives you an excuse to not take responsibility for your own will. ironically, that belief in and of itself is an absolute.
I guess I can't really say for sure that I know anything. I don't know that I have faith in anything. I don't know for sure that anything I believe is true.
probably the biggest reason these scriptures and my comments feel fake is it's not something I would do...not anymore anyway. the scripture tends to revive with in me a religious fundamental sense of Christianity and it's easy for me to ramble on as such.
whatever, I think I'm rambling.
No comments:
Post a Comment